What Doesn’t K*ll You Doesn’t Make You Stronger Is Bullsh*t
The Push Through Mentality We Were Raised On
I get why so many of us still buy into that old line.
It is what we were raised on.
Keep going. Just stay strong. You’ll be right.
That push through mentality gets passed down like it is a badge of honour, especially for capable women who have built their identity around being reliable and steady.
Next week things will settle down.
They always will… apparently.
You are praised for being strong in the face of adversity.
Celebrated for finding a way to keep going even when you are running on next to nothing.
So of course you assume surviving it all is what makes you strong.
You have probably been rewarded for it your whole life.
But here is where I question that version of resilience we have been sold.
If Surviving Made You Stronger Why Are So Many Women Burning Out
If the line “what does not kill you makes you stronger” was universally true…
why are so many strong capable women silently struggling?
If taking every hit truly built strength, the strongest women wouldn’t be burning out or feeling disconnected from themselves.
And if pushing through was the thing that made you better…
why does your body eventually step in and give you a wake up call you cannot ignore?
Because constantly surviving is not the same as constantly strengthening.
Endurance is not proof of resilience.
Sometimes it just means you have normalised suffering.
The Moment Coping Turns Into a Cost
Real resilience is not about taking endless hits.
It is about recognising the moment when coping turns into a cost.
It is knowing yourself well enough to say
“Hang on… this is not strength anymore. This is sacrifice.”
True resilience does not come from staying under pressure.
It comes from what you do once you finally step out of it.
That is where clarity and sustainable strength grow.
Not in the constant emotional exhaustion of pushing through.
Think About One Woman You Genuinely Admire
Not because she is perfect.
But because she carries herself with a sense of steadiness and self respect.
Her family life is well.
Her work actually means something to her.
She makes space in her week without guilt.
She is not stretched thin all the time.
Not because life is easier but because she has learned how to protect her own peace and energy
She is not constantly bracing for the next hit.
She is not holding everything together for everyone else at her own cost.
She knows what she needs and she calls time when she needs to.
That is the kind of life many of us want in this stage.
Something solid. Something aligned. A life we actually feel at home in.
And that kind of clarity is real strength.
Not depletion dressed up as resilience.
When You Keep Pushing Through Nothing Changes
If you keep buying into that old version of resilience that tells you to push through everything, nothing changes.
Life stays cramped.
Your spark keeps dulling.
Your sense of self starts to erode.
And eventually life will step in and give you a wake up call you cannot ignore.
Your health. Your relationships. Your direction.
Or the parts of yourself you have been sidelining for years.
Staying loyal to that belief will not make you stronger.
It will make you slowly disappear from your own life one small sacrifice at a time.
A New Kind of Strength
At some point you get to decide.
Do you want strength that sucks the life out of you
Or strength that supports you, expands you and aligns with the life you want next
If the second one is calling you and you can feel yourself wanting to step into next year differently the 2026 women's one day workshops and networking events are now open and I am honouring the 2025 price until December 31.
You can book your place directly at the link HERE